Since I have no one in my life willing to even talk to me, I have decided to keep a very personal and private journal. I have a desk drawer that came equipped with a lock. It is where I keep my own things away from others. I have made a notation it is to be open only upon my untimely demise. Other people have managed to successfully disappear. Why shouldn't I become one of them? My own mother, Emma died quietly recently of mysterious causes. My grieving father, Owen Niels, married Judy Bakersfield only a few weeks after her death. She obviously did not marry him for his money. Apparently no one private or professional is willing to loan him any more money. Neither one of us has a substantial inheritance from a deceased relative. She did not marry him for his looks. We can be classified as being unattractive. Could it be Judy is blackmailing my father?

Even when Emma was alive, he was unfaithful to her on numerous occasions. Judy probably has photographed evidence of his unfaithfulness. She most likely was one of his many lovers. Maybe she hired a professional photographer to take the pictures? I would not put it past her to resort to such devious methods to obtain her goal. Matrimony to her lover! She is welcome to him! I sincerely hope they live unhappily ever after.

I have packed my bags and included all of my important information including a copy of my birth certificate, drivers license, and proof of insurance. All of my public school records. It took me some time to locate all of them. The problem is I have never had to work for a living.

My mother made sure all of my financial needs were adequately taken care of. She left me some cash from her household accounts my father was unaware of. If Owen would have been aware of it, he would have wasted it on wine, women, and song. Talk about the prodigal son. I was cursed with a prodigal father. The problem was all of the money was in small denominations. Wait for a minute. It could work out to be the best after all. Bills in larger denominations would attract unwanted attention from too many people.

The only other asset I had was my perfect driving record and lower insurance premiums as a result. My mother left me her car. Owen wanted to sell it to help pay his numerous gambling and other debts. It would not have made much of a difference. I would not give him the chance to sell her car. She made certain it was in perfect working order and had a full tank of gas. I would not even bother to say goodbye to my father. There was no love lost between the two of us. I have to close my journal. It is earlier in the morning, and Judy and Owen were still making love to each other.

Love as always, Roxanne Lea Dubarry

Roxy Lea 1954

Roxy 54/ October Country

September 19, 2018