I remember that day as vividly in my mind as if it were an hour ago. I woke up, took a look at the alarm clock, and decided that it was too much of an ungodly hour to be up. I tried to turn over and fall back to sleep, but I could tell it just wasn't happening. I gave in, and dragged myself from the bed, and into the bathroom. After a long cigarette, and a few other necessities, I was awake almost enough to function. I sat down at the computer, thinking maybe today I could finally write something useful, after three weeks of writer's block, but that wasn't working either. So I flipped on the stereo. Eminem came on, louder then I was hoping to hear itbut still, I couldn't find the words I needed to write.

After an hour of torturing myself in front of that computer, I gave up, and sacked out on the couch. Just then the phone rang. As I picked up, I was about to start cursing out whomever was at the other end, but when I heard your voice, I managed to stop myself just in time. You said you woke up too early too, and that you couldn't get back to sleep. Hell, why notthe sun's almost up anyway. I asked you to come over for a little while.

Dragging again, I finally got off the couch, took a shower, and headed into the kitchen to make some breakfast. I heard your car pull in the driveway, and for some strange reason, I felt excited. I quickly shook my head to clear it, and unlocked the door for you to come in. You came in, laid packages on the table, and told me that you couldn't believe that all week you haven't been able to get any rest. I remember muttering the same thing, how I just couldn't seem to sleep as I turned off the stove, and brought the eggs to the table.

Looking back now, it seems funny; almost like that day was destined to happen between us. Since then, our sleep patterns are back to normal, I still drag my ass out of bed by ten if I'm lucky, and you still get up at seven sharp. But I think I'm moving way too fast here.

After breakfast, we sat around and chatted, talked about old times, and some of the changes in our lives recently. As I listened to you talk about your new boyfriend, I noticed myself starting to feel angry, and sad. I thought to myself, why I am I feeling this way? But as hard as I tried to shake it off, I just couldn't, so I changed the subject as soon as I could. I brought up your car, and anything else that would distract me from the feelings I had inside, which had now morphed into a fantasy of me undressing you, and having my way with you. I was so shocked at what was in my mind, that I damn near jumped off the couch, sending the cat flying off my lap. You kept asking me what was wrong; I kept telling you it was nothing. Just then you saved me, by asking me if I felt like going into town and doing some shopping. I put on my jacket so fast it was probably a record. By the time you got yours on, I was already in the car waiting for you.

I still didn't feel like myself, even driving, parking, and walking around the store didn't seem to help. Something was wrong with me, and I was beginning to become afraid. Seemed like every time I would let my mind wander for a second, I would see these pictures of us in bed together. I thought to myself, this is ridiculous; you're going to lose it soon Lj.

Coming out of the store, it had warmed up enough that we both removed our jackets on the way to the car. The sun was shining brightly, and I couldn't take my eyes off you. Even through my sleep deprived eyes, I could see your beautiful body, your hair shining in the sunlight. I kept shaking my head to try and refocus my thoughts, but it wasn't working, my mind was running on overtime. These feelings were driving me insane, and I remembered that this wasn't the first time I had felt this way. For months now, it seemed every time I saw you, my thoughts would drift to your body, and the things I would like to be doing with it. The things I would like to be doing with you.

On the way back to my house, I could barely contain myself. I almost ran the car off the road when my mind drifted to the thought of you swimming naked in my pool, me standing on the edge watching you glide along under the surface. I remember thinking to myself, this has got to stop, she's your closest friend Lj, you can't think these things, talk to her about it, and she'll understand, and you'll feel better. But I couldn't imagine how to find the words to tell you what was in my mind.

We finally got back to my house, and I was able to calm my mind a bit. I began to unpack my packages, pulling out cd's, a few shirts, and a new bag of cat food, and piling them on the table. I asked what you had gotten, because lord knows, I barely noticed, and you showed me some toys for your cats, and a new swimsuit. My eyes widened when I saw the blue two piece suit and the hairs on the back of my neck stood up as I tried to picture you in it. It was a breaking point for me; I just couldn't handle any more of this. I asked you to sit down, saying I had something I needed to talk to you about, as I walked over to the fridge to find a drink.

I remember my words exactly," listen, I can't do this anymore, and I've been going crazy for a while now. I don't know how to even begin, but I have to tell you this. I keep having fantasies about us, about me making love to you, about the things I want to do with you. These fantasies have been waking me in the morning, and keeping me from getting to sleep at night. Now my writing is suffering, and I feel like I'm going insane. Trust me, I never planned this, I never wanted to develop these feelings for you, but I can't stop it."

I saw your face, the shock on it. I knew at that moment that I had screwed up bad, that I had probably destroyed a friendship that had lasted and grown for over ten years. I felt the tears come to my eyes; I had just made the mistake of a lifetime.

I couldn't believe your words. I always knew you were open minded, but I never imagined I'd hear those words come from your mouth. "Lj, it's ok, stop crying will ya? This is complicated, and I'm not exactly sure how to tell you, but I have feelings like yours. I've wondered for so long, what it could be like, and part me wanted to tell you, but I didn't want to lose you as a friend, and"

I interrupted you right then and there," Hold the phone! You mean you felt the same? Why didn't you say something?"

You laughed at me, and said," Why didn't you?"

I thought to myself, good point. I turned to you and said," Well, now that we got that out of the way." As I walked over to where you were sitting, leaned down, and kissed you firmly, tauntingly. I felt myself start to burn for you. "Since we're sharing, can I tell you what's been going through my mind all day?"

You smiled, so I began. I told you about everything, has I fantasized about watching you swim underwater for me, how in my mind I had wanted to jump in the water with you, and slide my hands inside that swimsuit and pleasure you under the surface, just watch the bubbles rise up to the surface as you moaned for me. Before I could finish the fantasy, you were up on your feet, starring into my eyes, holding up that new blue swimsuit, saying," why don't we finish this in the pool?

We walked out to the pool, hand in hand, but you never bothered to put on that swimsuit. We stripped off our clothes, and I watched you dive in the water, swim down to the bottom, and back up to the surface. The smile on my face couldn't have been any wider. I dove in, turned about four feet down, and swam up right behind you, blowing bubbles on your bottom, and back on the way up. I surfaced, and kissed the back of your neck hard. I wrapped my arms around you from behind, and started fondling your breasts, pinching at your nipples. Things really took off from there. While we swam, we talked about all our fantasies, even acted a few out. You became my mermaid, and you felt a rush of sexual energy you have never known. Seems like our friendship is stronger now then it has ever been, and as I sit by the bed, watching you sleep, reliving that day in my mind, I realize it was destiny, we were meant to be, if only for those moments. You are my closest friend, and I am so happy you are here in my life, and especially in my bed. When you show this to your boyfriend, tell him I'll never snatch his girl, but he better be good to my closest friend.